You will never believe the secret Hillary Clinton has been hiding!
As many people have said, thought and discussed in the past, Hillary Clinton must have a secret for her extremely young and stunning looks. Now it seems like they found out what that secret is!
WARNING: THIS INFORMATION MAY BE SHOCKING!!
A former uniformed secret service agent tasked with the Protection of Hillary, Robert Dansercoer made a startling discovery on his first day on the job.
“We were always wondering how Hillary could maintain such stunning good looks. And on that first day in March 2016 I got more answer then I asked for. More answer then I could handle even.. I managed to stay and live trough the horrors for 2 more months, but then I had enough, and I backed out.
Turns out, everyone that tries to get out or leave has to sign a form to guarantee secrecy. And that’s not all. We also had to swear allegiance to Belial…"
How does this swearing allegiance work?
This happens in a secret room in Hillary’s house. She goes completely naked wearing nothing but a dog collar, sits on her knees, takes the Doggy position and now acts as an altar. Then people in black, purple and red hooded robes place black burning candles on her back and they start to chant satanic Latin verses. When they are chanting, we, the prodigies or converts have to go up to the altar one by one. There is a ritual dagger and we have to use it to draw blood from our genitals. Then we have to offer the genitals to Doggy Hillary and she cleans the blood with her tongue and mouth. When that is done the male converts have to fuck Hillary’s brains out one by one. While the female converts get fistfucked by Hillary. This goes on for a while.
When that’s done Hillary squats over a silver chalice and fucks herself with the ritual dagger while catching all the blood and semen coming out. A dining table is then prepared, with one throne and several small chairs. Hillary takes place at the throne while gesturing us to take place at the small chairs. She then drinks the blood and semen mixture while saying satanic mantras in between, and finally orders the robed people to bring the main course.
A crying little baby is served to the table on a silver platter. Hillary doesn’t even flinch, but she takes the dagger and drives it in one of the babies eyes. She then proceeds to cut equal pieces of meat from the babies bottom and puts them on our plates. We then have to say the following line “We accept the great Belial as our lord and saviour!” and eat the raw meat immediately after.
For the final act we have to kiss Hillary’s anus (she farts twice), and then we can consider ourselves sworn servants of Belial."
Well that sounds kinda heavy. And how was the taste of the meat? How did Hillary’s pussy feel? Where can people sign up?
“For only 30 dollars you’ll get that information.”
Sorry we don’t have any budget left.
“I meant 10 dollars.”
...Okay, moving on, so you sworn allegiance to the devil and you backed out, you also took a vow to keep the information secret, so why are you telling us this now? And what is the secret??
“I faked my vow. I held my fingers crossed behind my back when I said the the sacred words, so they didn’t affect me. I’m still in love with Jezus, and we have sex regularly.
Now for the secret. As I have said before, we were served a living baby during the ritual. The reason I didn’t want to serve as one of Hillary’s protectors anymore was because she always eats babies. She cooks them, grills them, bakes them, barbecues them, she even makes baby jerky for when she’s on the road. In her house is an entire fridge with dead babies. And also a room with living babies. She runs a sort of baby farm, because she has about 100 women in a secret facility who give birth every nine months. They get impregnated, wait 9 months, get impregnated again and so on. She also sells half of the babies to other satanic covens and cannibals, to fund her election campaign.
I wanted to vote for her first, but now I’m not so sure anymore. It’s not that she eats the babies and stuff, I don’t really mind that, but the babies don’t even taste that nice, so we can at least say Hillary doesn’t have good taste in food. And do we want a tasteless president? I don’t think so. Her barbecue skills are also really bad, she always burns and chars the meat. And in my opinion, an American president has to have barbecue skills. I have a barbecue myself, so I was a bit bummed out when I found this out about Hillary. That’s also the main reason I quit.
Recent research has pointed out that barbecue skills and looks go hand in hand, so that’s where Hillary gets her supermodel looks.”
Okay, so the big secret is that Hillary can’t barbecue and that’s why she looks so good?
“Yes thats correct, it still freaks me out just to think about it… That stunning face and those horrible skills...”
Thanks for sharing Hillary's secret with us Robert! We understand your pain, I think Hillary will lose a lot of votes from barbecuing America after this article gets published. It’s a disgrace for our nation!